It has been a month since I moved to an entirely new country. I am now living in a whole new world – a new city, a new culture, new colleagues, new language, new flat. And every day is exciting and terrifying at the same time. Part of me longs for that feeling of complacency and normality, when everything is a routine and you are just living life without really thinking about. At the moment I feel like every task is taking all the brain power I have!
And I keep beating myself up about all this. I get frustrated so easily because in my head, I should be all over it by now. Every wrong turn in the car, every confusing conversation in Arabic/English, every difficult problem at work makes me angry that I don’t know what I am doing. That feeling of helplessness has been all too prevalent lately and I don’t like it one little bit.
But I keep reminding myself that I can’t underestimate what a major life change this is. I am starting all over again from scratch. Every component of my life, I have had to reestablish. And that takes time. But I’m getting there. I have a great flat. My wonderful friends have leant me a car. I have friends! Its sunny most of the time. And I have found the perfect coffee shop. On and the food here is amazing. There is a very real chance that after three years here, I will have turned into a chickpea.
I just need to be patient. This will all soon be my normal.